“He promised to marry me”

“He said we will get married”

“He said I’m the only one for him and said he would propose to me…”

“He said he loves me and will marry me but didn’t pop the question!”

Yen yen yen!!

I know… stop crying.. Unfortunately what you are looking for – “sympathy” isn’t here, as I’m not in the business of sympathizing with people, meet your therapist for that.

I chose this topic due to some certain reasons best known to me and also because we’ve seen men turn many Nigerian ladies to Lords of the rings, where they decorate them with beautiful engagement rings and years gone down the lane, the man reneges on his promise to Marry the lady. It can pain ehn! I mean Wakanda Man is that?

So dear Ladies, let’s drink a bottle in advance for what I’m about to say to you. You can sue that guy for promising to marry you and then NOT marrying you in turn. Why? Well… because this is a BREACH!

So technically in our legal Lingua, there’s already a “Breach Of Promise to Marry”. Yes! I know it sounds absurd, yeah? But it’s the truth. Promising to marry someone is a social contract and the failure to carry out that obligation is a breach which is punishable with a Remedy (in form of damages).

That is to say unequivocally that under the lens and jurisdiction of the Nigerian law, an agreement or a promise to marry a person is viewed as a legally binding contract, and if a party can succinctly prove that there was in fact a promise to marry, and the other party reneges, then a legal action / claim can be made out of this.

I’m sure somewhere in your head, you are thinking “is this one mad? What am I taking legal actions for against someone who says he doesn’t want to marry me again?” In truth you are right, but the role of the court in this is to ensure that justice is served and the aggrieved and injured party is well compensated for the damaged caused by the person who breached the promises to marry.

So how can I even know if I will win my case that he promised to marry me? 

It’s simple, here are facts that needs to be proved for you to have a strongly Built case, as he who asserts MUST proof:

1. That there was indeed a promise to marry

Now ladies, don’t get this confused, you both discussed sunrise in the Bahamas and sunset in Alabama doesn’t mean he has promised to marry you. You both discussing possibilities of growing old together in future and watching your grand kids play golf while you sip a bottle of “Domaine de la Romanee-Conti” on the golf course isn’t a promise to marry.

The best and most viable way to show that there was indeed an actual promise to Marry is by showing that the baby boy did put a ring on it… sure Beyoncé gave you all that advice already. You will need as much evidence as possible to corroborate this evidence as possible, simply because he could deny it and claim that he was coerced, and you must prove beyond reasonable doubt that he willfully proposed to you. Evidence like – photos and videos of him proposing, receipt of payment for Ring, voice recordings, Text messages, emails, letters sent etc. would do well to prove that there was truly an intention to marry.

2. The other party must have defaulted and failed to honor his promise to marry you.

The fact that he decided to shift the wedding date or postpone the agreed wedding doesn’t necessarily mean he has reneged on his promise, however in some obviously apparent event, where he has postponed the wedding severally and deliberately, you can claim that the Party has failed to honored the promise, as it is evidential that the party doesn’t want to forge ahead with the marriage.

What are the types of Damages that can be awarded in this type of civil claim?

– Damages for loss of finances if any was invested by the other party towards the promised marriage. Finances like Aso- ebi, wedding gowns and suit, bridal shower, bridal train gown, rental of hall, airplane and hotel booking expense etc.

– Damages in compensation for injury to the health of the aggrieved party

Written by Bamidele Olamilekan A 

Legal Practitioner, Brand influencer and Social media Analyst

Hope you have been able to learn one or two things from today’s teaching?

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You can reach Bamidele Olamilekan A via email – pexxie@yahoo.com