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I looked out the Window. Everywhere was bright already showing the breaking of the dawn. I was skeptical about going to work. What if Dr. Miles decides to call the police? Definitely he’ll know I sent those guys. Who else would want those tapes if not me? I’m very sure he never approached Kayode. I was a new worker if not I won’t even bother going to work till I’m sure the heat is off. Reluctantly I took my bath. I set off to Bosco’s place to know how the assignment I gave to them went. I met them in a Merry mood, drinking and dancing with three other girls. I wondered what the whole fuss was about. I remembered they were always this way whenever they hit the jackpot. When I say jackpot I mean a cool sweet deal. Someone must have given them a mouthwatering deal.

“Ahhhh aunty nurse” Bosco shouted on sighting me, giving me quite a scare. Realizing the way he said it had a negative effect on me he quickly put my mind to rest.

“See nurse nothing do you. Everything dey under control“

“Babes see na we get this city. No we dey rule“, hammer said.

I laughed silently. Some people just love singing their praise. Seems everything went well from the looks of things. I sat down and accepted a bottle of stout offered to me by Bosco.

“Oya tell me the koko, cause I no wan believe say only the job wey I give una dey make una dey jubilate so“

They both exchanged this secretive look between them.

“Aunty nurse nothing else dey o. If you see us yester night ehn, you for hail us. Na me be James Bond while Hammer na FBI”

We all laughed including the girls present.

“See interrogation. Whitey con dey shake like fish wey commot from water. I point gun for him prick tell am say if him no take delete the video from him laptop and delete any other copy wey him make say I go shoot am and make him just forget about fuck in for him life. Na im guy man begin piss for body dey beg us o“

We all laughed hysterically. That ought to teach him not to mess with me. I recalled how I cried and begged him but he wouldn’t listen to me so I felt no pity for.

“But come oh Bosco you wicked sha o‘, this was Hammer.

“The dude Don already succumb you still daze am slap. Heavy slap for that matter.

“Yes na, so next time he see nurse dey cone for right he go go left. If she dey come for front he go go right“

“Nurse you don see man cry before? Well this your whitey cry like small pikin“

I stood up

“Point of correction he is not my whitey“

I thanked them with promises of cooking better oha soup for them during the weekend before taking my leave. I smiled all the way to the hospital. Things went smoothly at the hospital. I saw Dr Miles just once and he quickly averted his eyes when I looked in his direction. That ought to teach him not to mess with me. Probably he’s been getting away with blackmail but he tried the wrong girl. I smiled happily at the outcome of the whole event. Nothing much happened at the hospital. I went on my usual rounds checking on the patients that were admitted but avoided Kayode’s room.

Around 4pm this cute couple walked into the hospital asking to see the doctor. Later Nurse Yetunde told me the purpose of their visit. They wanted a male child. Blessed with three daughters they desperately wanted their next child to be male and so they came in to consult the doctor on what to do or take to have a male child. Nurse Yemisi as usual made a joke about the whole thing.

“That woman is so lazy. All she needs do is get up her lazy ass from the bed and fuck her husband real good.”

“Ahn Ahn Yemisi you have started again. Whoever said the way one makes love has anything to do with the production of a male child?“, Nurse Ngozi chipped in

“Dey there make pant dey wear you. It’s been scientifically proven. Google it if you must“

Nurse Ngozi shook her head. Trying to reason with Yemisi is like hitting a brick wall with ones hands. To me Nurse Yemisi is light spirited while Nurse Ngozi was too serious.

Nurse Yemisi continued not minding Ngozi’s disapproving glare

“She needs to let him take her from behind. Then also ride him like a bugatti, if them no born boy change my name from Yemisi and call me whatever you like“

Ngozi hissed while I laughed. It was always fun being with Yemisi, if only Ngozi would lighten up a little. Finally it was dark. I couldn’t wait to go home. Nothing like a good shower and me lying in my soft bed watching one of those soaps on telemundo after a hard day’s job. I got home in a better mood than I was in yesterday, whistling under my breath, grateful to God for the little things. My phone rang. I opened my bag, looked at the number, the caller’s id was unknown. I picked wondering who was calling

“Hello” I said.

“Nancy what kind of sick joke is this?“

“Excuse me“

The joke was lost on me cause I didn’t get it or was yet to.

“Exactly what I just said. What the heck are you playing at?“

Is this person nuts. The person called my name otherwise I would have thought it was a nut job calling.

“First of all I don’t know what you’re talking about. Secondly who the fuck are you?“

“This is Kayode“

I cracked my brain searching for a Kayode I know except for the one I had sex with a day ago.

“Kayode who? Not sure I know you“

“Just stop already, stop whatever it is you’re doing. Stop pretending“,

This was confusing me

“I give you just 2 seconds to explain yourself or else I cut this call“

“Ok, hold on. This is Kayode. A patient where you work and right now I’m watching a video of us making love“

Oh no, no no no. I almost fainted. I caught myself before I hit the fall. Instead I crashed into my table.

“Oh my God, no no no...”

I heard Kayode’s voice from a distance asking if I was there.

I got a grip on myself

“Who sent it to you?“

“I have no idea and from the way you sound I guess you have nothing to do with it“

“Oh God no!!! How can I, why would you even think that?“

“Because there’s a note asking me to pay 10 million naira or they make the video go public“

Dear God please help me.

 Written by Tanya