I am a lady in need of your advice. I met a guy about 2 years ago and we have been in a relationship for 14months now. He’s nice to me in the sense that I have never had any reason to think he is cheating on me or doesn’t love me. We chat when we both can or when our job lets us. He is sure to call me at least twice a day and he is someone I can tell every/anything.
But my guy has found greater love in his car. Please I don’t want you people to feel I am materialistic or about my man’s money. I love him and am happy with him. But then, a woman needs to be pampered in a little extra way. He has never been there for me financially. After 8months into the relationship, I talked to my friend about this and she told me there are men that expects you to ask and there are some that doesn’t need their woman asking to know what they should do for her. She suggested I should ask him, even if it’s something very little, to know what his reactions will be and that secondly, me not asking him might make me look too independent and scare him away.
Low and behold, I thought through it all and decided to ask. I finally made a request and the response I got was that he just fixed his car and doesn’t have money. Every time I talk about any need, its either he just fixed his car or he has to fix the car.
I have gotten my man a couple of gifts just to surprise him, I get him shirts when I go shopping. Not that I am counting but I have never gotten a gift from my man in a relationship of about 14months. Dear readers, does that make sense? Is it normal? Is this relationship safe for me and my future? Is he in a relationship with me or the car? Please I need your sincere advice. Thanks.
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12 comments
Wow, doesnt get you gifts? I think that’s a problem and you really need to bring it up. We are usually passionate about certain things, cars, football, wrist watches etc and often expect the ladies to either love those things as much as we do or refrain from interfering, but this is not the case here. He may genuinely not think it’s important to get u gifts so talk to him about it and about how much gifts could go a long way in showing he loves you much more than words would. Communication and understanding are very necessary in every relationship.
You have to know your man better and where the relationship is heading towards and besides what is ur greatest interest u wish for in the relationship n work to it because u won’t find a perfect man.
Well its obvious the guy is tight fisted, but in 14 months in what other ways has he proved he cares about you if he has not exchanged a gift or given you money no matter how little. Anyway its up you to decide if you want to always beg for money when you eventually marry him because his type will only give feeding allowance and buy you cloths and shoes when you have family engagements.And then will he allow you work or do business so you will be a bit financially independent?Think twice.If he changes the better for you.
Hmmm. Its a sign that your man is a selfish man and its just dangerous for you to think the future with him. Cos if u do, then be ready to always bring to the table and he will keep giving u excuses like this. And u won’t be able to carry all the responsibilities of marriage all alone. So my dear, pls be wise…….. and please take note, you are not being materialistic
Hehehehe. Is d car a bugatti or a ferrari? If it is not then smash d wind screen and give him reason to spend the money.lol. Just kidding o…they have written everything I would have said but let me add, shine your ryes.
I will summarise my views with these two points:1. Love is not one sided! It takes two to tango, they say!2. No man can love without giving! If he is not giving, then he is not loving. Sure you won’t marry a man who doesn’t love you!
may i know the name of the car?
pls show understand,a man’s car is his prized possession,his car will always be there 4 him unlike you
Apparently, your man loves you but does not want to spend his hard-earned money on you. He’s a bit selfish and biased in the process for accepting your gifts, without giving you something in return. It’s quite unfortunate for you simply because you’re not stingy. Maybe he feels you want to milk him. And when a man thinks that way, it’s absolutely difficult for him to give out something. Trust me
ask nothing at all he is a human being like everyone else and it is what he should do or not. He is not an animal, has a brain as we all, let him do what he recent and you find a job and satisfy your needs in a love relationship should never let money and you never think it is he who must feed you or satisfy your needs
Hmmm, a man who doesn’t see the need to buy you gifts or care for you now will never give that care when you get married! If he loves you, you don’t need to ask, he too should be able to give surprise gifts to you. If you eventually marries this man, be sure you will be responsible for your children’s upkeep and he will never be responsible for anything. Why should the car be important to him than you? Pls, you will get a man that will love and cherish/care for you. Goodluck to you.
yes dey hv sed it all,any man dat isnt able to give to u without asking to take up responsibility as a man he unless u ask, den he doesnt love u gaskiya. as a man, u shld be able to give suprisingly to his girl,without being told.