I haven’t been on here for a minute. I have been a little tied down with my blog and some other life events, but I thank God.

So a few weeks ago, I asked a question on my Facebook page about sex and food. My question specifically was “would you rather cook for a man you are dating or courting or have sex with him?” I  got a lot of answers which also lead to me asking if sex was actually important in a pre marital relationship; but that’s another topic.

In answer to my questions, some answers got were as follows:

“Oh I prefer cooking first to having sex. I could and did cook, mainly because it is just an extension of me cooking for those I love…but when it came to dating, I would not cook in the man’s kitchen, I would carry the cooked food there. I cared enough to feed the man but did not want him to see me in the process of cooking, which I see as a very intimate ritual that only privileged people should see and partake in.But when it came to Micha, all the rules went out the window…I first shagged him then cooked in his kitchen upandan!”(they are now married)

 “I think the whole thing stems from how liberal people are about sex these days.  It is no more like such a big deal ‘cos it is all up in our faces. It is all about ur values. I’d say ladies place a bigger deal on cooking ‘cos it says/signifies something more serious in today’s world since it takes going out of ur way to please. sex is almost akin to breathing now and u just gotta breathe. so premised on this, I’d say the vayjayjay wins over the cooking pot. This does not reflect my own views tho.”

 “Every girl has a vagina, not every girl know how to cook or wants to bother!”

 “Cook. It is such a chore. I have to sweat and stuff. I have to be in the mood to cook. Gimme a body count anyday. LOL”

 “I prefer to cook, and I have legendary tales of guys who have gone to feed other babes with my food. I still prefer to cook sha.”

 “What is sex in the presence of a steaming bowl of food?  Sex be damned!”

 “Me I cook ooo. I don’t see it as slavery. We go chop am together. Na washing I call slavery. Wash your damn clothes my Fren!!”

” I cook, but ll never wash, sebi we ll both eat the food, ko si wahala.”

Sometimes when it comes to love, all the rules of dating fly out the window. Lades have you ever been slapped with a good dick? (I can’t believe I just said the “d” word). Asin, you will cook and have the sex and burn the food out of excitement 🙂

For me, I’d rather cook and to cook, I have to really like you. Even as a chef, I am very careful about my customers. Not every customer will appreciate your sweat; just as not all men would appreciate your cooking. Now when it comes to sex, it’s a different game for me. I have learnt that not all men who sleep with you will marry you and same goes for the men who don’t sleep with you. But for me, sex is a spiritual aspect of any relationship. I see food as very spiritual too; but hey! everyone likes food. We have to eat.  Just like the answer above, I will cook anything you want and have it delivered from my kitchen to you, but it’s a privilege to see me cook and in my elements. As much as I would like to cook for a man I’m dating as opposed to having pre marital sex, I will NEVER cook it in his kitchen. Not ever! But no telling what I’ll do when love hits me in the face though. I could toss all the rules. *covers face

See with sex, I am more inclined to wait. I don’t see it as important. I see it as an extra curricular activity that clouds one’s judgment especially when it comes to dating or courting. The dick or the vagina could be so good; that you forget yourself and what to actually look for in your relationships. It becomes a situation of “the power of a good dick.” or “the power of the female anatomy.”(y’all know I’m not lying 🙂

Sex is very spiritual to me; the exchanging of body fluids etc. I believe a part of whomever you sleep with stays with you for a life time. I’m not saying I’m perfect; neither am I saying that I’ve never had pre marital sex before; I have, but I’m saying I’m doing things a little differently now. Besides, to me; showing that I love a man is through my cooking for him. In my opinion sex does not prove love. I wonder how my readers feel about pre-marital sex. Comment below and do remember to join Elsie every Friday on the “Crux of the matter” with Elsie and let your heart out. Make we take am understand the koko of man and woman relationships 🙂