“Women cry too much. Real men don’t cry”
This narrative we live by.
It has indeed made so many suppress their emotions.
Man wey better cry dey hungry no go gree cry. He’d keep looking up like Jesus is giving him signs from above.
Women feel too weak after crying, especially in front of their lover or just random people.
The society sees you weak and vulnerable when you cry.
Some months ago, I had a discussion with a male friend of mine I really cared about. He said something I didn’t expect. I did not see it coming. I expected more from him, so his words hit me in a very wrong place. I felt the tears building, I did not want to cry. I tried looking away…I tried ending the discussion…I tried changing the topic. But alas, I cried, he saw the tears and the discussion ended. He said he didn’t expect that I would cry.
He also teased me by saying that a relationship blogger should not cry easily. That I talk about relationship on my blog and on Facebook. I did not respond, cos I wasn’t over how what he said made me feel. Even now, I’m not sure I’m over it but I’m sure not crying. After the tears during the discussion, I’m quite sure there isn’t any tears left for that issue.
I saw this somewhere:
“Don’t be afraid to be ‘too’. Too emotional, too straightforward, too whatever. “
Because of the expectation and the reputation we think we are building for ourselves, we try not to be human. Some people die daily because they want to meet the expectation of some fans, followers or people around.
That you talk about a certain issue from a logical point of view doesn’t mean life will not happen to you.
When it does, please cry if necessary. When the tears build up, let it flow. You are human.
I hear men say they cannot handle it when women cry. They call you cry baby. They say you are childish, you cannot have a matured discussion without shedding tears.
If you are human enough, then you would know whatever made her cry must have touched somewhere deep for her.
For me, I don’t cry over a situation more than once. It’s like my detox. If it’s really painful and I get myself to cry! I’m free and healed. That’s how it works.
“Crying makes us feel better, even when a problem persists. In addition to physical detoxification, emotional tears heal the heart.”
So do not let anyone make you feel less because you cry.
Do not confine your tears to your bed at night.
And don’t feel bad because you cried in front of a man. He should be happy he was able to share that special moment of feeling with you.
If he isn’t then that shouldn’t be your cup of tea.
And dear men, please cry if it comes. You are not weak. You feel and express. I’m not saying you should be forcing tears o. Just feel.
Let’s all cry when needed.
Emotional tears have special health benefits. Crying makes us feel better, even when a problem persists.
Cry whenever you can because I cry whenever I can
Do you need more reasons to cry? To feel? Click HERE
6 comments
Well said… We have been taught to “stay strong” so much so that we have forgotten that crying is also a way of being strong. Thanks.
Crying is a form of being strong and very vital healing step for some.\n\nThank you Bess
Very very well said.. recently i lost my mum and while everyone was asking me to be strong and not cry, a woman walked up to me and said “my dear, you’re human,losing someone isn’t childs’play let alone your mum and so if you must cry just go ahead and do so, let it out but first take off your glasses” lol..
Awww big hugs dear.\n\nGod bless that woman. When i lost my mom, i cried for 3 days non stop.\n\nInfact, the cry still comes occasionally but that cry then was needed.
Crying eases stress and emotions are released in the process
A good cry or two can naturally heal us both physiologically and psychologically. Crying is normal and nothing to be ashamed of biko.