Come Here And Chill

You’ve been talking to this guy for a little while. Texting, phone calls, twitter flirting(DM) – you like him & he likes you. Neither one of ya’ll is looking for a relationship, ya’ll are just coasting 😉 . Ya’ll are grown, Matured P’setting. During the middle of the day, or some night, you tell a nigga to ‘come over and chill‘, and that can mean a whole lot of things. It could be drinking, flirting, listening to music, sexing, talking,or watching TV – ya’ll are actually chilling.

But after 8pm, if you’re setting thirsty traps on twitter and you end up inviting a nigga over, its very disrespectful not to give up the panties (You’ve got no choice). If you invite a nigga over after 8pm, you are basically insinuating that you want the D. And though in your simple mind, you may be asking how (Yeah nice question), you have to consider the following:

1. Gas is expensive as f*ck – To be coming anywhere at all to see you is a miracle in itself, petrol is expensive in Nigeria, let alone at night.

2. He’s Missing Out –  Being holed up with your ass is causing him to miss out on whatever late-night P-setting is being thrown his way. You can bet your ass some twitter honey is poking her way through his DM’s. Though the p*ssy being thrown may not be as coveted as yours (golden pussy) ;), it’s in the night. Let him get his rocks off with you or don’t invite him in the first place. If he’s not missing out on another p*ssy, he’s probably missing out on a lot of other shit: smokes, drinks, sleep, Fifa, or time-out with his boys.

3. Horny Hours – Night time is when niggas start simping. Thoughts of vaginas start throbbing and dicks start swelling. Niggas are hunched over their laptops, silently cursing the buffering ass videos on PornHub and breaking out the Vaseline and olive oil =)) =D. Some make holes in they bed and start humping. Females are talking about cuddling on twitter (Most actually need the “D”). If you call him over in the night, I GUARANTEE the last thing he is thinking about is cuddling. He’s gonna assume you two are on the same page: SEX. N.B:- Don’t invite him over during your menstruation, that’s wickedness.

He’s not trying to watch a movie, he’s not trying to cuddle or talk with you. He’s trying to zoom his D into your Vee-vee. You might as well open the door with a bra and panty set on and start undoing his belt as he steps through the threshold.

Actually, a nigga like me as a badttsharpguy probably won’t even have a belt on. I bet I’ll be rocking some sweats and some nike slides for comfort. Remember, this nigga probably just rolled out of bed. So next time you hit a man with some “Come over and Chill” type of ish, remember what you’re getting into. 9 times outta 10, he’s gonna be expecting something from your ass. Whether you give him what he came for is up to you tho! Don’t leave a guy hoping!come here and chill

Written by @badttsharpguy

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20 comments

  1. I mean “no one just wants to cuddle……we all know what dat leads to anyways” so let’s not beat around d bush and give this nigga some P

  2. Lmao. Some crayy shii. If we were in iran wen petrol was less xpensive, it might be ok bt nt naija. And d guy prolly had to settle police on d way ova cos its nite

  3. If she is on the period just throw down a towel (preferably red), wear raincoat (condom), off light…business a usual. Who never see blood before…you no dissect rat for SS2?

  4. Tell them we din’t come over for fresh air….we’ve got AC instead!!let’s go straight to the matter.

  5. Lmaooooo best piece I’ve ever read in a while….. Omo see gobe, I sha invite ma male friends to come chill with me ni Bt at noon plus video games or lots of horror movies definitely not romance am not dat stupid….. Then a lot of respect to d word distance…. Like bed to floor ish… Taaaaah ha choro iri m…

  6. Come here and chill…just like that abi? lol. Petrol is indeed expensive! “If you invite a nigga over after 8pm, you are basically insinuating that you want the D”

  7. Omo meeeeehn,lmbo.. Solid piece, right on point and very relative. 9/10, this is perfectly the case. Other times, that particular 1/10, we really just want to cuddle. Only after giving you that good wood tho.

  8. If she z on her period and she invites u over @ nyt, you can like to forget about the pints of blood. @ least u r covered by the blood of Jesus.

  9. Carol, I'm really upset because of your post office (although mine has that effect quite often as well). If I get a bottle (and I think I will – and the Coco one), I'm definitely for splitting.

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