Okay so let’s talk about closure. What is closure really?
Closure – ‘An act or process of closing something’. So in a relationship, it’s the moment when you no longer have feelings for your ex and you are moving on to someone better.
Does closure happen overnight? I don’t think so. There is that moment in the first month of your break-up where you’re psyching yourself out of calling your ex, yearning for him/her and thinking about the person, so you fill your life up with everything and anything you can. It’s purely a mental closure, you physically slamming the doors shut in your mind. However, in the middle of the night, as you lay on your bed, thoughts of this person creep in and you wonder what they are doing and such.
But being a baddest G that you are, you would never give in to the temptation of breaking down and calling just to hear the sound of his/her voice, right? You would never stalk him/her, right? Right. You would never become a bugaboo, right? Right. The fact that you still have any feelings towards your ex…anger, hatred, love, jealousy, revenge, or passion…..signifies that you’re in a ‘fake closure’ stage.
Truly getting over an ex cannot be faked. Nope it just can’t. It takes time and in some cases longer time more than others. A day would pass without you thinking about this person, then several days until the person becomes a foggy memory. The day you realise you haven’t thought about your ex in weeks is when you know you have had your closure.
Then again sometimes we jump into new relationships while we are still thinking about the ‘ex’. This is just bad behaviour because it hurts the current person you are with….they don’t have your full attention and care. Although getting into a new relationship has been done before with relative success, with the new relationship enabling you to get over your ex faster.
We have to be able to recognise when we are fully over whatsher/hisface and ready to move on.