The package finally arrived.

Her excitement mounted as she tried to structure her evening in her mind’s eye. “Light meal of medium-sized grilled Salmon part; 3 small balls of boiled Irish potatoes and of course, Cole slaw. A shot of Cognac to aid the digestion of her meal; a luxurious soak in her pink bath-tub… lingerie in sinful purple and bright orange… then burlesque!”

She hadn’t been to her shop in 2 days. She was emotionally frazzled. Her suppliers had disappointed for the 3rd time in 3 weeks and her clients were getting really impatient. Her driver, as usual, had manufactured a new dent in her car and one of her tailors missed work, 2 days in a row and had not even deemed it fit to call. Ada felt like she was going to implode if a feather of bad-news fluttered her way and added to her growing pile of irritation. So on Thursday morning, she turned off her phones and stayed home reading her newly purchased Jeffery Archer novel; spending mummy-time with her daughters and letting the worries of business slide past her. On Friday, she still didn’t turn on her phone. Instead, she whisked her kids over to her mom’s place, gave her maid the weekend off and spent the night on her couch, drinking vodka and nibbling on sautéed prawns.

Today being Saturday, she decided to give herself a treat. She loved burlesque and always dreamed of staging a performance. Well tonight, she was going to perform….

Filling her pink tub with Aromatherapy bath-bubbles and a sprinkling of Epsom salt… (She’d heard Epsom Salt was good for the skin… she didn’t verify though) …She stripped off her clothes and stepped into the bath, slowly sinking down into the warm, inviting water. She sighed in relief as she felt the muscles in her shoulders loosen. Counting to 5o, she reached for her loofah and began to scrub her thighs in light circular motions. To circulate blood flow, she had read. She lifted one creamy thigh with ease… a wonderful feat to behold, considering she was an extremely buxom lady. Fat; some people would call her… Fuck You, would be her mental response. She scrubbed her body and wished there was a strong pair of male hands to do it for her.

Ada never dwelled on her love-life, or lack of it. She was too independent, comfortable and confident to pine over a man. She had her own business; making and selling clothes to the high and mighty… had her hands full with her kids… attending society shindigs and hanging out with her retinue of gal-pals. Her life was full and fulfilled. She wasn’t in dire need of a man. She had her 2 favorite sex toys to handle her ‘gardening’ and a third had arrived just this evening. She was doing ok but that didn’t mean she couldn’t miss a pair of manly hands once in a long while.

Scrubbed and gleaming, she rose out of the now tepid water, pat herself dry and tottered to her bedroom to gaze at her naked body. What she saw pleased her. A full-bodied vixen, fair as a natural sun-ripened orange, blemish less skin with two huge mounds for breasts. For her size, she had very tiny waist that accentuated her full, curvy hips. Her pubis was shaved clean; its fleshy lips jutting out just a little… to tantalize any lucky male that happened to clap his eyes on them. Ada was what would be described as a ‘ripe, sun-kissed tomato’ or as the local man would say “Asampete”.

She wasted no time in wearing her lingerie… a flimsy piece of lace with orange colored satin sash and trimmings. It was a clingy girdle with garter and stockings which left her large breasts exposed. She covered her nipples with black, shimmery Nipple Tassels and jiggled them for effect. Then she slipped on her purple, velvet, MaryJane heels… (She wasn’t big on heels but needed it for her performance) … and admired herself in the mirror. I look delicious. She applied her make-up expertly, sprayed her white musk and her favorite perfume then grabbed the package and headed for her living room.

Her bottle of Vodka and pack of cranberry juice sat on the side-table, awaiting her. Turning off all the lights, save for one, the living room was thrown into mellow dimness. With the A/C on, Ada sat on the sofa, poured herself a generous helping of booze and leaned back to savor the sexual ambiance of her living room cum stage. She had created a small space by shifting the dining table closer to the wall and displacing all the chairs except one. That chair was going to be her prop. She took another generous swig of her drink and felt the alcohol course through her insides, warming her and strangely arousing her. She caressed the package longingly, not in any hurry to open it and revel at its content. She poured another generous helping of Vodka and cranberry juice and turned on the sound system. “We Are Golden” by Mika blasted out from her strategically placed speakers. She sipped and bobbed her head to the beat. The drink loosen her up and her imagination soared. Dropping her glass, she carefully opened the package to reveal a brand-new, blue-tipped, Rabbit Pearl. Ada’s grin was infectious. She kissed the blue tip lovingly and whispered to it…

“Mama’s gonna perform for you tonight and after that, you’re gonna reward her.”

She checked in the pack and found the tiny remote control. Ada was prepared. She got some new batteries from a nearby shelf and inserted them. Then she turned it on. The vibrator whirred and she felt her insides clench in anticipation. Still bobbing her head to the music, she took a gratifying sip of her drink and twirled around in her living room in a dreamy haze. The song came to an end and a sudden silence filled the house. She positioned the Rabbit at an angle where she could see it during her performance. It was her audience… along with the thousands of imagined faces in her head. She cued the music with the remote and sat on the chair meant to be her performance prop. “Video Phone” by Beyonce came on.

“Shawty, what yo name is… (Uh uhhh) …Them hustlas keep on talkin’… (Uh Uhhh) …They like the way

I’m walking… (Uh uhhh) …You’re saying that you want B, so press record… and let you film me…”

She sat on the chair, spread her legs wide and seductively reached to trail a finger from her Mary Janes to her thighs, to her garter encased stomach and stopping at at her ample bust. Following the beat, she slowly gets up and walks to the back of the chair, dimming her eyes sensually. She performed an ultra slow waist whine and drops it low, getting back up by pushing her ass out. She performs a perfect twirl and stops by throwing a leg over the back of the chair. Her foot lands on the seat with an effortless thud. Ada leaned back, one hand in the air like a Prima Donna. She didn’t notice the door open. She didn’t see Jeffrey’s shock and she certainly didn’t see the sudden cloud of desire that crossed his eye.

Rising from her backward tilt, she realized she had an audience…. not her rabbit vibrator…. but a 6 foot 2, able-bodied male in joggers, palm-sandals, a Liverpool Jersey and a look of absolute desire tinged with bewilderment. She grabbed the remote control quickly and paused the music. She couldn’t cover herself up because there was no robe in sight.

“Next time you want to put on a show, could you lock your doors and probably invite an audience, outside your vibrator?”

Ada was mortified but she didn’t show it. Jeffery was her friend and neighbor at the shopping mall complex where her shop was located. His small Law Firm was also within the ‘complex’. They were very close but if she wanted a man to admire her, it certainly wouldn’t be Jeffery. She had ‘friend-zoned’ him from the first time they met four years ago and he’d remained ‘friend-zoned’. She liked him because he was always willing to listen to all the raunchy tales she and her gal-pals always yakked about and usually laughed along with them or gave them tips on how to please a man. As a matter of fact, Jeffery, to Ada and her friends, was a six foot plus, well-built girl with a penis. Just like her, the rest of her friends had ‘friend-zoned’ him also but he didn’t seem to mind… or so she thought.

“This is my private show Jeff… it’s not for an audience. Besides, what are you doing here?” Her curiosity at his presence overshadowing her embarrassment.

“You haven’t been to your shop since Thursday and your phones were off. As a concerned citizen, was kinda worried and decided to check on you before heading out to Sheraton for a drink. But seeing as you’re fine, I think I’m gonna invite myself to your burlesque show and enjoy. After all, its free and there’s free booze!”

With a confidence that amused her, Jeffery got a glass from the nearby bar, poured himself some vodka and cranberry juice and sat on the couch without the slightest affectation of interest. She wasn’t remotely shy that she was semi-nude and he had seen her. She was proud of her body anyways. But she was worried that he would think her little performance for her vibrator was weird.

“Please Ada, go ahead and perform. Vibrator and I will watch.. and after the show, I can sincerely tell you how your performance was.”

Oh what the heck! It was Jeffery afterall… its not like she’s interested in him or had any intentions to fuck him.

“Ok… but no criticisms… and no sniggering.”

Jeffery nodded in magnanimous agreement and watched her down his drink before returning to her make-shift stage and chair prop with an amused smile. Ada turned the music back on and Beyonce’s Texan drawl filled the room.

“ …I got no time for frontin’… (Uh uhhh) …I know just what I’m wantin’… (Uh uhhh) … If its gonna be you and me, when I call they better see me on your video screen…”

She began to perform again, this time amplifying the sexiness in her moves; bouncing her very full ass, jiggling her jugs and making the tassels dangle and cast diamond-like reflections all over her fair belly.

Jeffery refilled his drink and watched her dispassionately on the outside…. battling his attraction for her and a rapidly growing bulge on the inside. He’d liked Ada from the very first day he saw her and the more he knew her, the stronger his feelings for her became. She had made it clear that they could only be friends and he didn’t want to alienate her… so he’d agreed; hoping that someday, she would change her mind.

To distract himself and show Ada he was truly respecting his ‘friend-zoned’ state, he picked up the rabbit, studied it intently but without interest, and turned it on. Ada heard the whirring sound and was a bit disappointed he wasn’t giving her his total attention. She opened her legs wide, exposing fair flawless inner thighs and fleshy pussy lips. Jeffery didn’t miss it. He dropped the rabbit and sipped his drink with a hand that shook slightly. His bulge increased and he had to adjust his sitting position slightly so it wouldn’t be obvious. Ada turned her back to him, and dropped it low, bouncing her ass up and down. From Jeffery’s point of view, all he saw was a juicy ass spread out like well a baked bagel, waiting to be buttered. His erection threatened to drill a hole through his joggers. He gulped and finished his drink in one swig.

“…You like it when I shake it…? Shawty on a mission, what yo name is…? What…? You want me naked? If you liking this position you can tape it… on your video phone…”

Jeffery felt his pre-cum create a wet patch on his joggers and reached into his pants to adjust his errant dick. Ada turned at that moment and saw his hand in his pants. She stopped and stared at him, her look strangely vague. An excuse bubbled to his lips.

‘I’m only human Ada… no one is gonna watch that ass bounce and not get an erection.”

“Keep touching yourself Jeff……… and shut up!”

Encouraged, he released his troubled dick and it bounced free like a gangsta, nodding frantically. His dick was quite impressive, Ada noted with a small smile. He gave it long strokes, watching the fascination on her face. “Who knew Jeff was packing this kinda luggage down below”, she mused. The Song came to an end and she punched the remote. A moaning sound filled the room. Jeff’s eyebrow lifted.

“That’s my mood music…. have I ever told you I like it when a man wanks? Super turn-on for me dude.”

Jeff smiled and leaned back, stroking his dick a little faster and looking at her with a need so raw, it made her wet instantly. She picked up the rabbit and turned it on. He watched her as she sat opposite him, spread her legs apart, spit on the rabbit to lubricate it then began to insert it into her pussy.

Jeffery’s eyes narrowed to slits as he watched the blue tip disappeared into her fleshy folds. She turned it on and the whirring sound started. The moans from the speakers got louder, his hands got faster, the rabbit whirred, the little protrusion stimulated her clit and she moaned. He groaned inwardly. She threw one hand behind her to grab the back of the sofa while the other hand held and guided the vibrator as it moved inside her. She closed her eyes, breathing deeply. Jeffery couldn’t take it anymore.

He was out of his seat in a flash, knelt before her and yanked the vibrator out of her pussy; replacing it with his mouth. Before she could protest, he was sucking on her clit and tongue-fucking her all at once. Ada grabbed his head and moaned aloud. Her moan and the moans coming from the speakers heightened his senses.

His dick was so engorged, it actually hurt. He got up, pushed her roughly on to lying position, lifted one thigh and penetrated her. Her scream was like an aphrodisiac. He jammed into he roughly, fucking her like a demon possessed man. He wanted to do so many thing at once but his release was paramount.

Feeling his orgasm about to peak, he withdrew from her and leaned to suck her hugs breasts, his hands squeezing every part of her luscious, soft body. She moaned as he flicked off her nipple tassels and allowed his tongue work her nipples to sensitive peaks, her hand reaching down to stroke him. Hegrabbed the rabbit, turned it on and jammed it into her pussy, turning it this way and that while it rotated inside her. Ada screamed out in ecstasy and bucked her hips frantically. He worked her with the vibrator, occasionally bending to kiss and place little bites along inner thigh. With one hand holding the vibrator in place, he straddled her, placing his dick between her cleavage. She spit on his dick to lubricate it and squashed her boobs together to encase him. Jeffery began to fuck her breasts while working the vibrator. Ada attempted to catch his dick-head with her mouth with his every thrust. He increased the speed of the vibrator and the clit stimulator tickled her clit so furiously, she screamed out in release. Jeffery watched her cum and felt like shooting into her open, gasping mouth. She squirmed and bucked, her orgasm coming both from her clitoris and her vagina.

“Give me that back baby… You’ve been dropping down and bouncing those ass-cheeks. Now I want to fuck you from behind.”

Ada turned willingly, bending over the arm of the couch till her hands touched her tiled floor. He pulled her ass back, bending her knees into squatting position, then he spread her ass-cheeks. He admired her spotless skin before pushing her ass further apart. He located her wet, pink center and dug in. Ada yelped at the force.

“Oh yes Jeff… Fuck me hard….”

He held on to her hips and pounded her… HARD. Her plush, bouncy ass made him mad with need and he fucked her with so much zest that she cried in delight as another climax washed over her. Then she did the unthinkable…

…She peed!!! His dick was still pounding away when she felt the hot liquid release itself and trickle down her thighs.

“Arrrgh…. I’m gonna cum…. fuck it!” he groaned aloud.

His shaft was buried so deep inside her, she was tempted to let him shoot into her womb. But tempting as the thought was, she pushed him out just before his release. He cupped his hand and shot warm spurts of cum onto his palm, grimacing in orgasm as he did so. They lay on the couch, spent and panting.

When he eventually got up, he headed for the guest toilet to wash the cum off his hand. Ada seized the opportunity to inspect the couch cushion. Sure enough, there was a little patch of wetness on it. She quickly turn it on to the other side. Her embarrassment rushed back to fore and she prayed fervently that Jeffery hadn’t noticed. It was bad enough that she had fucked him, but sealing it with a pee???

Utter mortification!

He returned to the living room, boxer and joggers in place like he didn’t just fuck her to ‘pee-dom.’ He gave her an uncertain look, expecting her to do something totally untoward. She beamed him a bright confident smile that belied her shame.

“Congratulations Jeff. You’ve just been elevated from ‘Friend-Zone’ to ‘Fuck-buddy’. You owe me dinner at the very least”

His chuckle broke the tension.

“Madam burlesque… this audience wants to tell you how much he enjoyed your performance and would like to show some appreciation… so go get dressed and let me take you out to dinner”

“I’ve had dinner… but I could do with a little dancing and clubbing. What say you fuck-buddy?”

Jeffery smiled. He wanted to tell her how he really felt about her but she had ‘zoned’ him once again. Now he’s graduated from the ‘Friend-zone’ to the ‘Fuck-buddy-zone’.

“Patience….” he told himself. “That’s all you need Jeff. A little more patience…”

THE END!!!

Image Artwork by @jbwashingtonart on Instagram

Written by Dame Twitter – @Dame_caucus

www.damescaucus.com