A problem shared is a problem halved – one of the phrases I grew up hearing a lot. I however, do not think that I fully grasped the meaning and importance of this phrase until now because in retrospect, there was a time I detested the idea of sharing my problems with people, anyone – friend, family, colleague, acquaintance… I truly did. My reason was simple – people are wicked. And to be honest, people can actually be very wicked. No argument.
Also not forgetting the role played by social media. Seeing how people are willing to create content from one’s personal experience, without permission, makes you learn to keep all your guards up. I am a very private person (unfortunately people find this hard to believe because of my work in the media space), I am. And if my personal life has to be out there, then I love to control the narrative as much as I can. So knowing that anyone could possibly want to drive traffic, get retweets, using my vulnerability scares me.
Growth is beautiful especially when you acknowledge it, even if it’s just to self. There are concepts of living that I detested and now that I think about it, the intense dislike for the above phrase came from a place of hurt, pain, abandonment, bitterness, disappointment and thinking that people owed me. Growing into understanding that nobody really owes me has helped me let go of some amount of pain that I carried for a long time. It also shields me from taking on new negative energy. I own my choices and the consequences that come with them – good or bad. It has helped me appreciate good people in my life, taught me to live in the moment and cut down expectations while understanding that the universe moves on whether you move or not.
Beyond all these understanding lies my exposure to the need for great mental health and doing all I can within my power to protect my space. Our psychological, social and emotional well-being is important at every stage of life and has got the tendency to be heavily strained as we grow into facing the world as adults, if not properly taken care of. One of the many ways to maintain a healthy mental space is having great support system and getting the best out of them. Sharing helps unburden you. You must have come to a point in your life where you feel like you are not able to hold up things inside you, they are killing you from within and you are about to implode or explode. Sharing becomes your prerogative. You must save you by sharing…with someone. Being vulnerable is the strength you need and can be gotten only by sharing because a problem solved is still a problem half solved, regardless of what the world is turning to. There are still good people and you can build your tribe, segment your tribe for different purpose and truly live.
I have been there, many a time. I cry, let my entirety feel the rush of emotion and I speak to someone. Whether the problem is career, family or emotional, I have people who can at least try understand each area of my life or better still, not judge me. And when I don’t even know why I feel the way I feel, I speak to someone.
Please learn to share because the minute you open up about it, 90% of your problem gets over then and there. Sharing could be done virtually as well or via chat. However you choose to, just share. Your mental wellness is one of your greatest asset. Keeping it 100 is a big deal.
1 comment
Wonderful write up
and i also still believe the saying that a problem shared is half solved
But times have changed. These day friend’s, families and colleagues have all changed.
My advice is usually to have a support base, and always stay close to that base.
The other advice is be careful who you share your issue with because while some are worried over your issues others are glad you have issues.
Again, by sharing one problem with the wrong person , one could end up multiple problems, so be careful when sharing
So the takeaways is have a support base. Always be there for your base members so that they will there for you too
Best. Wishes