Long distance relationship

long distance relationship

As much as I believe in love and a bit of the saying -“love conquers all”, I am of the opinion that it cannot conquer the battles that comes with distance in a relationship (when I say relationship in this article, I mean the type that happens between a man and a woman involving hormones and other vital things…you get my point?). I see the long distance relationship advocates’ blood boiling but be still, for I am a fan of long distance relationship too.

I am at a stage in my life where I need me enough alone time to plan and execute, Study, inspire me and Come up with articles to inspire and encourage others, work hard and pursue my dreams , visions and goals head on. Therefore, a long distance relationship with a matured supportive man should be one I would love, don’t you think so?

Long distance relationships comes with its ups and downs. Some will tell you they would never tread that path but what happens when you are faced with the confronting circumstances? Quite a number of people are involved in this thing (pardon my French) called long distance relationship but going by my standard, not many of them are in a relationship. I will call what most of them have a ‘shady long distance relationship’. Realize that a relationship without trust, commitment and faithfulness is nothing but a shady one. Though some do venture into this kind of relationship knowing they are just living their lives away in an unknown dream that definitely leads nowhere or having fun along the line till the real thing shows up.

Being in a relationship is not for everyone, same as being in a long distant relationship cannot work for everyone. What works for me might not work for you.

I understand most of us get carried away, even sink into our feelings and waste our precious time on the illusion of love. Pause and ask yourself, “Am I truly in love or just attached to this person in question?”

For a long distance relationship to work for you, then you and your partner must have the following attributes and have made some decisions: (NOTE: You and your partner)

  • Both should be sure and decide they want to be together and would do everything in their capacity, humanly possible to make the relationship work.
  • Both must be open and communicate.
  • Both must have a great deal of understanding.
  • Both should know when the other needs space.
  • Maturity is a major factor

When all that is established, you would trust and know your partner. Once you trust and know your partner, you won’t have to get worried when s/he doesn’t pick your call, although a little show of jealousy makes the heart grow fonder. Be matured enough to stay true and faithful. Missing a loved one is never easy yet it can be one of the great moments of such relationship. Missing someone gets easier every day because even though you are one day further from the last time you saw them, you are one day closer to the next time you will. There is no harm in taking a little break when your partner is going on an indefinite journey.

A friend of mine would say, “The time of your youth should never be wasted on the illusion of love. If you are meant to be then allow it, time will sort you out. The strain is much.”

Distance is not for the fearful, it is for the bold. If you know you can’t then be bold (in your own way) enough and be sincere. Long distance relationship is for those who are willing to spend a lot of time alone in exchange for a little time with the one they love. It’s for those knowing a good thing when they see it, even if they don’t see it nearly enough. Distance means so little when someone means so much to you.

I won’t advice you for or against long distance relationship, all I would say is, “Search yourself – Is long distance relationship what you want for yourself? Can you cope? Is your partner on the same page with you? Is this love? How soon would it fade away? Can you stand the test of time? Are you ready to fall in and out of love with your partner? What are the things he/she does for you that money can’t buy? What fascinates you in him/her asides sex?”

When you have answered these questions sincerely, then you decide.

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.” – Helen Keller

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15 comments

  1. Mbok…….. Wats distance again?? Even in skol I neva liked calcating dat shit its nw in my relationship I wil be calculating seen and unseen days!!! Ngwanu….d distance wil be alrite witout my r/ship!!

  2. Gud piece of article, its really inspiring n breath taking. Keep up d gud work…… Nice one

  3. True talk. It’s not easy. But one key thing that’s missing here is friendship. If you date your friend as opposed to someone u bumped into at the club or a chic u picked up on the road, the level of understanding between both partners will be deep enough to withstand most challenges. After all, if u don’t see a close friend for a while, it doesn’t reduce ur closeness. Overall, long distance relationships can be even more stable than regular relationships if you have friendship, trust, understanding & mutual consideration, and (VERY CRUCIAL) constant communication – this is one avenue where lovers break up most often. If u don’t keep in touch with ur loved one, someone will do it for you, don’t allow a good samaritan become a splackavelli. There is a popular slogan that applies to stick situations when ur get/friend has a close guy friend that is always there to comfort herwhen u fight or who she confides in a lot (excuse my French) “beware of her comforting friends…. a shoulder to cry on, can be a d**k to ride on”

  4. It’s beautiful if one can truly give it all it takes, but it ain’t easy one bit I must confess

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